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The Key to Happiness 


Tuesday, June 29, 2004

"He's far too egocentric to be self-destructive," she said. "He always seems to land with his bum in the butter."

Or,

"He always seems to squeeze lemon juice square into his eyes."

"He always seems to affix excessive umlauts to ädjëctïvës."

"He always seems to buzzsnore after a meal of treacle."

"He always seems to lick lozenges with his ears."

"He always seems to inflate his neck when operettas conclude."

"He always seems to balance yolks on his nose while tiptoeing across a razorblade."

Which means that "happiness [should] be classified as a psychiatric disorder."


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