Work Before Pleasure 

Monday, September 20, 2004

Weird jobs that lurk in my past:

1. Telemarketing for the blind.

2. Hand-colouring dice cards for a private lawyers' casino office party.

3. Writing Christmas cards for the lightbulb factory executives.

4. Making small talk with Korean businessmen (or, the ESL equivalent of Japanese hostess bars).

5. Putting 25,000 ladybugs into cloth bags for wealthy socialites.

6. Selling mushroom purses in Japanese flea markets and at Japanese craft stores.

7. Transcribing Taiwanese pranksters' heckles for Bill Gates.

8. Creating crossword puzzles, cryptograms, jigsaw squares, crostic puzzles, alphabet soups, quotefalls, and syllacrostics for Asian teenagers.

9. Editing the phone pages.

10. Cleaning up supermarket aisles covered in shaving foam.

11. Wiping toilets with coins embedded in them - I was a housemaid for the fabulously rich.

12. Kneading noodle dough with my feet for an udon restaurant in Japan.

13. Grape-harvesting.

14. Chicken-plucking.

15. DJing in Transylvania.

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