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Making Fun of People 


Monday, December 19, 2005

Some names are funny or stupid or both. Take Brittney. No one who takes their daughter seriously would call her that. Or Barbie.

The problem is, once you have friends with those names, you muffle your reaction lest you insult your friends. You can no longer crack jokes at their expense or say behind their backs, "Gee, I wonder if Bambi knows she has a stripper name." Eventually your friends will hear and glare at you. Then you will be shamed into buying them making-up gifts to get onto their good side again.

However, if you make fun of these names prior to meeting a person burdened with such a name, even in as public a forum as a blog, your get out of jail excuse is automatically, "But that was before I knew what a wonderful person you are."

So, before I meet any more people, I proclaim the following names free game for a ruthless round of butt of the the joke:
  • Sandra
  • Kirsten
  • Zachary
  • Alexa
  • Ralph
  • Margaret
Stupid names! Well, just for tainting us with a lifetime of groaning over your names, it's open season on you. Get ready for stuff like, One day, little Zachary wrote to Santa Claus, "Please send me a sister." Santa Claus wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother." Ha! Take that Zacharies of the world!

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