Compendium of Google Searches 

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

I wasn't going to blog for a while, but I've just dug up my lists of weird searches that have led readers here. Going back to 2004 when I finally added Sitemeter, these searches make writing Maktaaq worthwhile:

1. hamster emails
2. indiebride poem
3. "japan men" photo "long hair"
4. woman eaten poo
5. krazy kat skirt
6. dr and mrs vandertramp song lyrics
7. hamster ladders
8. contact with deceased ladybug
9. spook the parrot
10. drugstore and biscuit beetles
11. bride porn
12. dream analysis guinea pig
13. squash, plural
14. big brown nipples
15. topless hula girl toy
16. what type of yoghurt can hamsters eat
17. guinea pig clothes
18. tooth extractions fetish
19. zombie fortress [this one was used twice this week!]
20. my hamster is throwing her babies across the cage why
21. what is written on the godmother's business card
22. wet butts sex
23. pink hamster
24. strawberry shortcake adult comic dominatrix
25. wood sliver infection of the finger
26. what noise does a wookie make?
27. dream dictionary fingernails fall off
28. origami freddie kruger fingers
29. lewis and clark encountering werewolf
30. "how to survive a robot uprising" -"with more interest"
31. tweety bird birthday party for thirteen year old
32. grapefruits vs flatulence
33. The touching, massage, closeness guinea pig plan
34. insect squish fetish stories
35. pitt bull method of killing
36. chinese zodiac sign toxic rabbit
37. radioactive cutlery 2004 Bush
38. preserved babies in formaldehyde
39. queer eye bourgeoisie:
40. fresh pork of my thoughts [note: this was my second post as a blogger way back in 2002]
41. guinea pigs music notes tone (-"as guinea pigs") ( -'""guinea pigs"")
42. possum rat nutella
43. praying mantis tattoos
44. origami krueger claws

The searches have shifted from hamster menstruation (it can happen!), the one search I was once guaranteed to be #1. I still get a lot of slipper spanking, Marissa Imrie and Mohammed Bijeh, but not enough to make me really certain of what my identity really is. Am I a morbid ghoul or am I fraught with a latent sexuality borne of a convent upbringing?

Makes me want to write more about shepherding guinea pigs through Gobi Desert sandstorms. Or something.

I find myself particularly fond of numbers 34 and 44. What the hell?
I knew ap person who had a dream of herding guinea pigs (the silky long haired type) with the help of trained cats.

In the end it was a bloody mess the cats killed all the guinea pigs, and this person became a crazy cat lady who could never ever satisfy her pets' constant craving for guinea pig blood.
hahahaha... Thanks for the laugh. I really needed it today :)
hi. i found your blog written somewhere. we must have met at some point, but i dont know where! how weird huh?
Justin: I'm quite partial to numbers 8, 20 and 33.

Yelling Rants: Her dream was correct. Cats will stoop to eating guinea pigs.

D.: You're welcome.

Anonymous: You're not leaving me many clues to figure out who you may be.
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